top of page
Search

Ep 91 - The Things We Let Slide

  • 1 day ago
  • 5 min read

People ask all the time why Donald Trump bothers some of us so much. They expect the answer to be policy. Taxes. Tariffs. Immigration. Judges. The usual cable-news buffet. And yes, all of that matters. But the deeper answer is uglier and harder to undo. Trump did not just change policy arguments. He helped change what millions of Americans believe is acceptable behavior.


When cruelty gets permission, decency becomes the first thing pushed out of the room.
When cruelty gets permission, decency becomes the first thing pushed out of the room.

That may be one of his most damaging legacies. Not because he created cruelty, racism, conspiracy thinking, or political violence. He did not. Those things were already here, tucked into the corners of American life, sometimes loud, sometimes whispered, sometimes dressed up as “concern.” What Trump did was make the ugly thing feel safer to say out loud. He did not invent the rot. He helped remove the shame.


Permission is not persuasion. Most people are not converted overnight into the worst version of themselves. Instead, they are shown, over and over, that the worst version of themselves may no longer cost them anything. A leader mocks. The crowd laughs. A lie spreads. The base excuses it. A threat is made. The party pretends not to hear it. The lesson lands.


We understand this in everyday life. A boss who laughs at crude jokes teaches the room what is tolerated. A parent who ignores bullying teaches the bully what they can get away with. A family that stares silently at the mashed potatoes while someone says something vile teaches everyone at the table where the line really is. Silence teaches. Laughter teaches. Excuses teach.


That is the permission structure. It is not always a direct command. It is often something quieter and more corrosive. I will cross the line, and you will move the line behind me. I will say the ugly thing, and you will explain why it was not really ugly. I will do the cruel thing, and you will insist the real problem is the people who noticed.


Trump’s political style has always been soaked in contempt. The nicknames. The mocking. The humiliation. The revenge fantasies. The demand that every critic be treated as corrupt, every opponent as evil, every institution that resists him as illegitimate. That is not strength. It is dominance theater for people who confuse cruelty with courage.


And once cruelty gets permission, it becomes entertainment. “Owning the libs” is not an argument. It is not a governing philosophy. It is emotional junk food for people who want the feeling of victory without the burden of being useful. Someone gets humiliated, and the crowd cheers. Someone gets threatened, and the crowd shrugs. Someone gets deported, and the video gets passed around like a touchdown replay.


That is not politics in any healthy sense. It is a cruelty economy. Targets are chosen, fed to the crowd, clipped for social media, and turned into proof that the movement is still strong. Immigrants. Journalists. Disabled people. Women. LGBTQ people. Poor people. Black people. Muslims. Judges. Election workers. Teachers. Librarians. Pick a week, spin the wheel, somebody gets turned into the punchline.


The same thing has happened with racism. Racism has always known how to change clothes. After the civil rights movement, overt racism became less acceptable in many public spaces, so it adapted. It learned to speak in code. “Inner city.” “States’ rights.” “DEI hire.” “Replacement.” “They do not share our values.” “I’m just asking questions.” These phrases give people plausible deniability while still delivering the intended message.


But the Trump era did something else. It did not eliminate dog whistles. Those are still everywhere. It made some people comfortable skipping the whistle entirely. That is why we now see public racist outbursts in grocery stores, restaurants, parking lots, school meetings, airplanes, and customer-service counters. Racism is not new. The weakening of shame is the story.


The same permission structure applies to political violence. Violence can come from more than one ideological direction, and pretending otherwise would be dishonest. But the evidence does not support the right-wing fantasy that left-wing violence is the main threat in America. Far-right extremism has been responsible for a disproportionate share, and in many analyses the majority, of lethal extremist violence in recent years.


Violence usually starts before the punch. It starts with language. Opponents become enemies. Enemies become traitors. Traitors become vermin. Immigrants become invaders. Judges become corrupt. Election workers become criminals. And eventually, someone decides they are not just hearing rhetoric. They are hearing instructions.


Most Trump supporters are not violent. That is true. But movements do not need everyone to commit violence. They need a small number willing to act, and a much larger number willing to justify it, excuse it, minimize it, laugh it off, or change the subject. You do not have to do the thing to give the thing permission.


That is where the permission-givers matter. The leaders model the behavior. The emulators copy it. But the permission-givers excuse it. They are the people who say, “I wish he would not say it that way, but…” or “I do not like the name-calling, but…” or “I think he goes too far sometimes, but…” Every “but” moves the line.


This is not about claiming every Trump supporter is racist, violent, or cruel. That is too easy, and it is not accurate. The stronger point is that a whole lot of people have decided that racism, threats, cruelty, dehumanization, and authoritarian language are no longer deal-breakers. That is not a small distinction. That is the whole ballgame.


If your political opponent behaved exactly this way, would you excuse it? If Barack Obama had mocked disabled people, called judges traitors, lied about losing an election, encouraged rage at election workers, praised violent supporters, and talked about immigrants like vermin, would the same people be shrugging about tone and praising the policies? Of course not. The standard is not the behavior. The standard is the jersey.


That is how the line moves. Not all at once. One excuse at a time. One laugh. One shrug. One “he did not mean it.” One “it is just a joke.” One “both sides.” One “I do not like that part, but…” until behavior that once would have shocked people becomes just another Tuesday.


Presidents leave office. Laws can be repealed. Policies can be rewritten. But culture is harder to repair. Once people learn that cruelty gets applause, it is hard to teach them shame again. Once people learn that threats can be dismissed as passion, it is hard to restore accountability. Once people learn that decency is weakness and domination is strength, citizenship itself starts to rot.


That is the danger of permission. It does not just change what people do. It changes what people defend. It changes what people excuse. It changes what people teach their children to ignore. And eventually, it changes what a society is willing to call normal.


SOURCES

CSIS report on U.S. domestic terrorism trends and far-right violence - https://www.csis.org/analysis/escalating-terrorism-problem-united-states

CSIS 2025 update on left-wing and right-wing political violence trends - https://www.csis.org/analysis/left-wing-terrorism-and-political-violence-united-states-what-data-tells-us

ADL report on extremist-related murders in the U.S. in 2024 - https://www.adl.org/resources/report/murder-and-extremism-united-states-2024

Reuters report on Trump’s “bloodbath,” “vermin,” and “animals” rhetoric - https://www.reuters.com/world/us/bloodbath-vermin-animals-trumps-rhetoric-trail-2024-03-22/

PBS NewsHour segment on Trump’s violent language and dehumanizing anti-immigrant rhetoric - https://www.pbs.org/newshour/show/trump-under-fire-again-for-violent-language-and-dehumanizing-anti-immigrant-rhetoric

DOJ Election Threats Task Force information page - https://www.justice.gov/archives/voting/election-threats

Brennan Center survey on threats and safety concerns among local election officials - https://www.brennancenter.org/our-work/research-reports/local-election-officials-survey-may-2024

Princeton Bridging Divides analysis of 2024 election threats and harassment - https://bridgingdivides.princeton.edu/analysis-threat-and-harassment-data-2024-election

The Nation’s publication of Lee Atwater’s 1981 Southern Strategy interview - https://www.thenation.com/article/archive/exclusive-lee-atwaters-infamous-1981-interview-southern-strategy/

Berkeley Othering & Belonging Institute overview of the Southern Strategy - https://belonging.berkeley.edu/new-southern-strategy

Comments

Rated 0 out of 5 stars.
No ratings yet
Add a rating

© 2023 by Train of Thoughts. Proudly created with Wix.com

bottom of page